Dropping this guy off at his barracks the day he left for the war on Terrorism. I remember saying that I would send him a letter that day to see how long it would take for it to get to him. It didn't happen. When I arrived at my destination I sat back and thought about what events were going to happen to this guy. I then remebered a wild eyed man sitting on his bed who was saying how a change of pace might be beneficial and work out for the better. How he looked forward to going somewhere new instead of fighting to stay where he could rehabilitate. Although I knew the situation that awaited him, I enjoyed the fact that he was attempting to convince himself that leaving was the right thing to do. Ahhh... Optimism... the spice of life. You know the rest of the story better than I. <fast forward> I wonder how that diary is coming? Are you making the journal entries every day? I would bet a kidney you are not, but if I loose the bet I have my fingers crossed. <rewind> Damn I still have to replace that guys car sun visor. shitbag...
Down to my last hand grenade...
<fast forward> so anyway, I am talking with the doc and I am saying to my self. Self... "what in the heck are you doing?" My self answers back and says "leave me alone". I look at the doc for some good news. Nope. doc says "We need you to lay off for 4 months". I sit for a minute and try to absorb this. I knew it was coming but I still was not ready to hear it. Optimism and false motivation are not exactly in my repetoire (neither is good spelling habits and grammer). Did you see that chicken scratch you sent me? You must have been in the middle of a firefight when you wrote it. I had to go to a farm and have it decifiered but that was after I had it checked for anthrax. Where was I? Oh yes, sitting here on a computer that is not mine. Did I tell you about that virus that wiped out the HDD? ["Under my head." "Well where's your other hand?" "Between two pillows."] So how about those Seahawks?
With the enemy advancing fast...
I try talking to myself again. "Self?" Self says, "I am trying to ignore you." I reply with, "I know but I need a little help here, a little motivation, a little somethin somethin..." Self says the same thing he's been saying my whole life and I just don't listen which is why self ignores me when I ask him what the hell am I doing with my life or what kind of mess have I gotten myself into this time. But self humors me this time anyway, and it kind of went like this.
But I the pin...
You have learned everything you basically needed to know when you were 16, you just have to put it together and make it happen. Some people never put it together. A 16 years olds brain in an adults body... What's missing? knowledge, perhaps, but not really. Maturity, yes but in a different form called wisdom. And wisdom is the key. And that's what really seperates the men from the boys. Of course there are trials and errors, there are mountains and mole hills. Not everything is going to go how you expect or would of liked. But wisdom from all these lessons and applying it stops from going around like the rest of the idiots with their eyes closed to the big picture. So without going to far off what's the lesson here? How can I benefit from this, what is it I still need to learn. To be more optimistic, no not really... It's patience, A virtue I have been chaising my whole life. But patience is different than easy going, it is different than anything other than the word itself means.... Patience really means stop and take a deep breath before you react. Because when you do you will contine with your wisdom, and not your emotions or the whole disposable society full of materialistic people we have created and have to deal with on a daily basis.
So self said this... The problem is that you are the strong and they are the weak.
So I'll leave you with this...
Keep you head out the line of sight.
Walk around like something could happen at any second and this is a real war, don't get complacent.
Smile and laugh it off when you talk to all those sheep you are forced to be with.
And remember it's only temporary and when you come back we'll pick up right where we left off...
Working out. Boxing. Healthy diet. Feeding your brain and exercising all your options.
Since you have some time on your hands. Make the perfect list and when you get back, start it!
If you need anything let me know and I will send it to you. 5 cases of power bars, pictures of the girl I slept with two weeks ago... whatever, you name it, and if it doesn't explode I'll send it.
